Happy New Year!
2018 was a year of seismic changes in my life. The beginning of the end of my 20-year marriage has taken center stage but I would say that I have grown exponentially because of it and there were many good things that happened this year despite the turmoil.
My daughter Haley graduated high school! Haley has overcome some trials of her own this year as she was diagnosed with diabetes and suffered the relocation of her long-term boyfriend to another state. She is becoming the independent woman I raised her to be. She is learning to drive, going to college, and celebrating the new year in Atlanta!
My son, Brennan, has continued to flourish despite everything too. He has continued to excel in chorus and drama in school and has really shined in both realms performing solos and being selected for all county, and all state in chorus and becoming one of the leading actors in drama in last spring’s musical, and this fall’s Shakespeare festival. This spring he secured the role of Rock Star: Conrad Birdy in THS’s upcoming “Bye-Bye Birdy!”
Through it all my kids have supported me completely. We have stuck together, committed to find a way to maintain our home as we look to the uncertain future of preparing for a new one.
This morning as I was preparing for the future by packing boxes for the eventual move? I discovered some notes from the Men’s Bible study group I go to on Sunday mornings. The notes in question must have been from the heat of my filing for divorce because they revealed the sharp pains I was going through at the time.
The notes were based on a teaching from one of the guys in our group, He presented the “3 needs of life”. The three needs of life were:
So, I had written those points out with the following personal reflections.
1. Love – No Love. My wife loves _______.
2. Significance - Job re-assignment and transfer feels like a demotion. My wife’s complete disrespect and betrayal. Divorce will cost almost everything.
3. Security – I have no idea where me and my kids will live and what we will live on.
At the bottom of these delightful insights, I had scrawled: GOD help me!
It may have been bright in August but those were some dark days.
But you know what? God did help me!
Back in the spring of this year, before this craziness, I signed up to take classes to get my master’s degree in Christian Counseling. So, around the same time as I wrote this note, I got on with my studies. The class? “How to Deal with Emotional Crisis”. No kidding.
One of the texts for this class was “How to Handle Your Emotions” by June Hunt. The book leads Christians through the process of how people of the Christian faith are to determine their Self-worth and to deal with emotions like depression, grief, anger, fear, and rejection. It was an invaluable resource in getting me to properly deal with everything I am going through. The Lord has used it to bless me and I have taken it and taught lessons from it at Celebrate Freedom, our local Christian Recovery group.
It showed me that I had LOVE, SIGNIFICANCE, and SECURITY in God the Father, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit. My worth is not based on my marriage, my job, or my performance. I am priceless. God loved me so much that He sent His Son to die for me. He has given me His Holy Spirit to live in and through me. I am never alone because He will never leave me nor forsake me. I will never die. If this body gives out, I will find myself in the kingdom of heaven surrounded by loved ones and fellow brothers and sisters in Christ who cheering me on as I walk in faith.
My divorce isn’t over. I still have to list and sell my house. I don’t know when it will be over or where I will live afterwards but I know that come what may I will overcome because of the blood of Jesus Christ that has washed me clean and given me life never ending.
Thank You JESUS! Thank You GOD! Thank You HOLY SPIRIT!
If you have had a bad year, say a simple prayer to make Jesus your Lord and Savior. Put your faith in Him and you can walk through anything!
God bless you and yours!
Happy New Year!