You Can Never Go Home Again - A Walk Among the
Tombstones - Purity 885
Purity 885 11/10/2022 Purity 885 Podcast
Purity 885 on YouTube:
Good morning,
Today’s photo of a lamp post illuminated pathway
leading to the Oswego River reflecting the multicolored lights of the city, all
underneath the relatively white and pure light of the full moon comes to us from
yours truly as I decided to go a walk into the night to revisit some old
familiar haunts in my alma mater’s city.
Well, it’s Thursday and as different as today is from
most Thursdays I wanted to be consistent in my efforts to encourage others to stay
on or to get on the path of Christian Discipleship by sharing another photo of
yet another pathway as a visual representation of my sentiment that life is a
journey to be walked out and it is best done in the presence of God, specifically
through a covenant relationship with Jesus Christ as one’s Lord and
Savior.
Yeah, after last night’s walk through Oswego’s
Riverwalk and some of the familiar haunts on the Oswego’s West Side, I am
feeling somewhat nostalgic and disturbed about what I saw and what I felt as I
walked through the shadows of Oswego’s streets and my contemplation of my college
days in the distant past.
A lot has changed since my college days and my last
visit to Oswego. I am no longer the person I used to be when I lived in Oswego,
and no I won’t just say “went to college in Oswego” because that would cheapen
the truth of my experience.
From 1990 to 1994, although somewhat sheltered and
provided for by the generosity of my family who paid for my “studies”, I had
the opportunity to really explore who I was and who I wanted to be for the
first time without the shadow of my family, of being just one of those “Clark
boys”, impacting how others or how I myself, saw me.
I got to be “me” for the first time in my life and
it was in those years that the small dream to be a writer, that really began after
reading Stephen King when I was thirteen, started to blossom and shape who I
thought I was. I saw myself as born of
the same stock as Stephen King, Earnest Hemmingway, Henry Miller, Jack Kerouac,
and even William Shakespeare. I fell in
love literature and the idea of being a writer but as bold as I was to fill my portfolio
with wild experiences of running into the night, I didn’t really have a
direction and certainly have the disciplines to write on a consistent basis.
Even though I now write six days a week, what!, I failed at the most basic level, that writers
write!, right?. For all my confidence and courage to question authority, to anarchically
defy it, and to push the boundaries of
my experiences, I was sheepish in actually pursuing writing. It was an unknow
and unfamiliar path I was in love with, and I was afraid to follow it because I
didn’t know where it was going to go, and I felt inadequate in light of the writers’
talent that I admired.
Also I had really tied myself up in knots in terms
of addiction. While I prided myself as being able to handle my liquor and to do
the drugs and not let the drugs do me, the not so pleasant consequences to wild
living and the resultant dependency revealed that I wasn’t as free as I
thought. But that would only take divine intercession and 25 years to figure
out.
On last night’s tour of Oswego, I started with a
sense of excitement and exhilaration as the crisp blowing winds coming off of
the Oswego River reminded of my youthful exuberance for the night. I gloried in those first steps of how
wonderful the River looked and how good God was to safely bring me here to experience
the beauty of the moment and I thanked God for the experience.
But then I walked on down to the familiar haunts on
Water Street, that were no longer familiar, and discovered not only
disappointment and a sense of grief over the things that had changed but also
felt shame and regret and deep sympathy for younger me, who was oh so ignorant,
oh so lost. Old City Hall was a
favorite drinking establishment of mine on Water Street back in the day but while
the building is still there it doesn’t appear to be to be a bar, or anything
else, today. Across the Street, The
Ferris Wheel another less preferred bar is still in business, but as I chose
Wednesday as the day of my return, downtown Oswego was a veritable ghost town,
which I was actually glad for.
I don’t think the party scene is, in terms of
alcohol, is anywhere near what it was in the 1990’s in Oswego, but I was glad
that I didn’t have to navigate around groups of college students out on the
streets seeking for thrills. And the
solitary, dark, coldness, really brought home that those days in my past in
Oswego are over, and that person of who I was back then have died.
But that’s a good thing. I’m alive in Christ and a
whole lot smarter than I used to be.
As sad as seeing how things had changed, how
businesses and buildings themselves were just gone, I was glad that there was no nostalgic pull
to return to the days of old.
But with that said, my wanderings did bring me to
visit a few sites that I fondly remembered. I passed what I believe were a
couple of sorority houses back in 1990s t and a house where my friends had
lived on West Third Street, But again
these buildings weren’t sorority houses anymore and my friends had moved out
nearly 30 years ago, 30 years…
Although I didn’t quite know where I was going last
night, I did have a plan. I always loved Oswego’ Old Style movie theatre on
West 2nd Street, as a pretense to get me out of my motel room way
out near the shopping centers on the east side, I decided to go see a movie. I
ended up nodding off to Prey for the Devil, which is not exactly high praise,
because I figured it might give a couple of jump scares and I could consider it
as more research for spiritual warfare.
But before the movie, I had this pull to “get to the
house”. I was a member of a fraternity
and that command to “get to the house” that would yell at pledges was always
answered by me eventually while a student and as alumni. The house was where to go. Brothers were
there. Parties, fun times, and women were there! Get to the house!
So I followed that call.
But the thing is, that while my fraternity still
exists, “The House” at 30 West 5th Street was burned down by an
arsonist during winter break of 1992. Although
there was initially talk of rebuilding, the fraternity eventually sold the land
and bought a new much smaller, rather comparatively dismal, new house.
So as I walked through the shadows of the night and the
recollection of the past, I was a man without a home but still called to
go. No one has done anything with the
property at 30 West 5th Street. Someone put up a doorway trellis
where our pathway once led up to the stairs of what was a mammoth house. So I took a photo of it, like someone taking
a photo of a loved one’s tombstone. (if
you would like to see all the sights from last night’s wanderings I am sharing
a link to my Facebook post that presents them. The last photo in the collection
is the Trellis, it’s a little creepy.”
Photos From Oswego on Facebook
So while the walk through the tombstones of my past
in the city of Oswego was a little sad, and the movie barely succeeded in
keeping me awake, I walk away from it
all with a sense of gratitude and gladness.
I loved my times in Oswego even thought they were severely
worldly and broken in light of what I have come to know about the Lord and the
meaning of life, but that was my
life. I’m glad I searched for who I was
back then. I’m glad I was bold and courageous in establishing “me”.
In truth, although I have regrets about the bad things
that happened and the fact that my fear, feelings of inadequacies, and addictions
kept me from following my dream, I can’t say that I didn’t give it a try. I
tried to live according to world told me that would lead to my happiness but
when you are following a lie it doesn’t matter how earnest you are, or aren’t,
in pursuing it. A lie can never lead to truth,
and it shouldn’t be surprising that doesn’t bring peace either.
But God is good, and He was gracious to show me the
only thing that matters in life is knowing Him and living according to His
ways.
All the parties, friends, and excitement of youth
are good for a season, but time marches on and that progression really reveals
that we were living in an illusion. To quote John Cougar Mellencamp’s Jack
& Diane: “Changes come around real soon, make us women and men”. So we can’t stay there in the good old days,
that were really a lie, a fleeting moment of our lives that were based bad
information.
However, we don’t have to be sad about moving on
into the hard truths about growing older and having to provide for
ourselves.
That is of course, if we really pursue the truth and
seek the mystery of God. The good news
is unlike last nights journey through the night, when we seek the Lord things
don’t get darker, things get brighter as God will reveal just how good He is
and how good our lives can be when we stay in His presence and follow where he
leads.
So keep waling and talking with God. If you aren’t
doing that, get on that pathway that leads to life and life more abundantly.
You don’t have to deny your past, but you can get past it by coming to
understand the depths of what we didn’t know and how much better God’s way is
for us.
Today’s Bible verse comes to us from “The NLT Bible
Promise Book for Men”.
This morning’s meditation verse is:
Galatians
6:7 (NLT2)
7 Don’t be misled—you cannot
mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant.
Today’s
verse urges us to not be misled into thinking we can somehow avoid God’s
justice and teaches us that we will indeed reap what we sow.
Okay
the verse says harvest what you plant, and actually I would encourage everyone
to check out the New King James version of this verse, and to use the NKJV as
your foundational reference if you study the NLT.
Galatians
6:7 (NKJV)
7 Do not be deceived, God is
not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.
So
as you can see, the NLT says the same things, basically, but it is different.
Study all the versions of the Bible if you like but be assured that if you
consult more than one version and study the whole counsel of God, you won’t go
astray.
As
for going astray, that reminds me of my college days where among other worldly philosophies,
I believe dthat “rules were made to be broken” but I always had the hopes that
my cleverness would keep my violations hidden or at least keep my safe from
prosecution and suffering.
But
it didn’t, I was arrested and changed once, detained and questioned and let go
on a few occasions. I also suffered the negative physical, emotional,
psychological, and spiritual consequences for my rebellious and wild
living.
As
much as I may have “gotten away with” things in some areas, I didn’t fully
realize that there was no getting away from what I planted. In some way or fashion, I, and everyone of us
will reap what we sow.
Cause
and effect relationship show us this in the natural, but we should really be
concerned with the unseen, our futures and where we will stand when God calls
us to give account of our lives.
No
matter how much you get away with in life and no matter how skilled you are at
keeping negative consequences at bay in this life, the jig is up when you die, as the word tells
us that it is appointed for men to die once and then to be judged.
Sorry
those who believe in reincarnation – one life only.
Sorry
Atheists, there is a God, and He will judge you whether you believe in Him or
not.
And
sorry, if you don’t make Jesus the Lord
and Savior of your life, there will be
hell to pay.
You
won’t avoid God’s justice and you will ultimately reap what you sow.
So,
trust in Jesus, rejoice over your salvation, but be sure to take today’s verse
to heart in all its implications by also repenting our old rule braking ways
and follow the Lord’s plan for your life, your sanctification.
___________________________________________
As always, I invite all to go to mt4christ.org where I
always share insights from prominent Christian theologians and counselors to
assist my brothers and sisters in Christ with their walk.
Today we continue sharing from Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s
“Discipleship”, also known as “The Cost of Discipleship”
As always, I share this information for educational
purposes and encourage all to purchase Bonhoeffer’s books for your own
private study and to support his work. This resource is available on
many websites for less than $20.00.
The
Sermon on the Mount
Matthew 6
On
the Hidden Nature of the Christian Life
The Hiddenness of Practicing Piety
“And
whenever you fast, do not look dismal, like the hypocrites, for they disfigure
their faces so as to show others that they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they
have received their reward. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash
your face, so that your fasting may be seen not by others but by your Father
who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you” (Matt.
6:16–18).
Jesus takes it for
granted that disciples will keep the pious practice or exercise [Übung] of
fasting. The life of a disciple requires the strict practice of austerity. The
only purpose of such practices [exercitia] is to make disciples more willing
and more joyous in following the designated path and doing the works required
of them. The selfish and lethargic will, which resists being of service, is
disciplined; the flesh is chastened and punished. The practice of austerity
makes me feel the estrangement of my Christian life from the world. A life
which remains without any ascetic discipline, which indulges in all the desires
of the flesh as long as they are “permitted” by the justitia civilis [civil
order], will find it difficult to enter the service of Christ. Satiated flesh
is unwilling to pray and is unfit for self-sacrificing service.
So a disciple’s life
requires strict external discipline. This is not to suggest that the will of
the flesh can be broken by discipline. The daily death of the old self cannot
be achieved by anything other than faith in Jesus. But persons of faith,
disciples whose will is already broken, whose old selves have died to Jesus
Christ, do know precisely the rebellion and daily pride of their flesh. They
know their lethargy and lack of discipline and know that to be the source of
arrogance which must be conquered. This takes place in daily and extraordinary
practice of discipline. The disciples are meant when it is said that the spirit
is willing, but the flesh is weak. Therefore, “watch and pray.”[192]
The spirit knows the path of discipleship and is ready to follow it, but the
flesh is too fearful; the path is too difficult for it, too uncertain, too
arduous. So the spirit falls silent. The spirit affirms Jesus’ commandment to
love one’s enemies unconditionally, but flesh and blood are too strong, so that
the commandment does not become the deed. Thus in daily and extraordinary
exercise and discipline, the flesh must learn to understand that it has no
rights of its own. The daily, orderly exercise of prayer helps in this. So does
daily meditation on the word of God, as do all sorts of practices of physical
discipline and austerity.
At first, the
resistance of the flesh against these daily humiliations comes frontally; then
later it comes hidden behind the word of the Spirit, that is, in the name of
evangelical freedom. The flesh’s resistance to the word of Jesus becomes
evident whenever evangelical freedom from legalistic coercion, from
self-martyrdom, and mortification is played off against legitimate evangelical
use of discipline, exercises, and asceticism; whenever lack of discipline and
disorder in prayer, in using scripture, or in one’s physical life are justified
in the name of Christian freedom. In such circumstances people have lost sight
of the fact that daily life in discipleship is foreign to the world. They have
also lost sight of the joy and the true freedom which genuine discipline gives
to the life of disciples. Christians will have to attack the resistance of
their flesh whenever they recognize that they have failed in their service,
that their willingness has weakened, that they have become guilty influencing
the lives of others or causing the guilt of others, that their joy in God is
fading, that their strength for prayer is no longer present. Christians who
recognize that will try to get ready for better service through spiritual
exercises, fasting, and prayer (Luke 2:37; 4:2; Mark 9:29; 1 Cor. 7:5). The
objection that Christians should take refuge in faith and scripture and forsake
asceticism is without any merit. It is without mercy and has no power to help.
What is a life of faith, if not an endless manifold struggle of the spirit
against the flesh?[195] How can anyone live in faith whom prayer
makes slothful, who is tired of scripture, or whose joy in God is stolen by
sleeping, eating, or sexual desire?[1]
---------------------------more
tomorrow------------------------
Join our “Victory over the Darkness”, “The Bondage
Breaker”, "Freedom in Christ" series of Discipleship Classes via the
mt4christ247 podcast!
at https://mt4christ247.podbean.com, You can also find it on Apple podcasts
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Audible.com.
These teachings are also available on the
MT4Christ247 You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@MT4Christ247
Email me at mt4christ247@gmail.com to receive the class materials, share your progress, and
to be encouraged.
My wife, TammyLyn, also offers Christian
encouragement via her Facebook Group: Ask, Seek, Knock (https://www.facebook.com/groups/529047851449098 ) and her podcast Ask, Seek, and Knock on
Podbean (https://feed.podbean.com/tammalyn78/feed.xml)
Encouragement
for the Path of Christian Discipleship
[1]
Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Discipleship,
ed. Martin Kuske et al., trans. Barbara Green and Reinhard Krauss, vol. 4,
Dietrich Bonhoeffer Works (Minneapolis, MN: Fortress Press, 2003), 158–160.
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