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Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts

Friday, October 8, 2021

Bridging the Gap between Friendship and Marriage- Purity 544


 

Bridging the Gap between Friendship and Marriage- Purity 544

Purity 544 10/08/2021  Purity 544 Podcast

Good morning

Today’s photo of the entrance and exit to the Buskirks Bridge in Buskirk NY was taken by yours truly as yesterday’s journey caused me to take a new step on to an uncertain path that is undertaken with the assurance of love and the hope of faith.  

Did you know, if you fake the g out of the word Bridge, you get the word Bride? How about that! 

Well when I took this photo yesterday on this side of the Buskirk Bridge, I had no idea that I was going to ask TammyLyn Seguin to be my bride before the day’s end. 

Oh don’t get me wrong, we have known each other since the spring and have grown in our relationship as fellow travelers on the path of Christian Discipleship, and then as close friends,  and have recently revealed to one another the depths of our love for one another and the desire to be joined together in marriage and not be parted until the Lord calls one of us home.  Through our discussions we decided that we were more than friends and because we wanted to follow the Lord’s will for our lives we both agreed that the next steps beyond friendship would be a quick transition marriage that may cause the casual observer a case of whiplash from the rapid transitions of our relationship.

Living together or having a relationship of casual or not so casual sex wasn’t an option for us and is not an option for those who truly wish to follow the Lord’s plan for relationships between men and women. Y’all better watch out because I’m pretty sure we will have some victims of collateral damage from all the shots fired from that statement.    

Our society has compromised so much on sexual ethics and relationships that a man and a woman agreeing to marry before having sex or living together seems like a radical idea these days but is actually what the Lord would encourage us to do: to value ourselves and one another by making a covenant of love and commitment before giving away what is supposed to be reserved for husband and wife.  

So TammyLyn and I had already decided that this period of “boyfriend and girlfriend” would be brief and had even decided on a tentative wedding date before yesterday.  I had only to get an engagement ring and decide upon when and where I would propose.  

I had even discussed with a secret co-conspirator in TammyLyn’s family a tentative plan to propose to TammyLyn at a family outing at Whiteface Mountain this weekend. In fact that was the plan. I expected to receive the engagement ring today, Friday, and then pop the question on Saturday. 

Which brings us to yesterday and today’s photo. On this side of the Buskirks Bridge, I was proposing on Saturday.  On the other side of the bridge, I contacted the jewelry company that was making the ring to find out when I could expect delivery and discovered that I had mistyped my email address into the order and that I was to receive the ring by 4:30pm on Thursday instead, a day early.  

As anyone who has read this far probably knows, I teach a discipleship class on Thursdays at Rock Solid Church. It was through my podcast and teaching these classes that I met TammyLyn. TammyLyn has been the most faithful of all the students who has been in my classes, driving an hour to attend and sometimes being the only person to attend the class in person!  So yeah, we could have been officially “in a relationship” for a much longer time but we both had some soul searching and growth to do in the months since we met to realize that we both wanted the same things and that our love for one another was great enough to be committed to overcome the challenges of bringing our two lives together with marriage.

So yesterday, when I got the news that I would have the ring in hand and that I would be seeing TammyLyn at class, I felt a heavy conviction in my spirit that “today was the day” that I was going to ask TammyLyn to be my wife. 

I considered the date.  The date was 10/7.  And if we look at those numbers we see:

a 1 which is the number for God the Father.

a 7 which is the number of perfection, and the number for the Holy Spirt

a 0 which is like a ring, a circle that has no beginning or end. 

If we add these together we get an 8 which is the number for Christ the Redeemer and just so happens to look like an infinity symbol when you put it on its side.    

These considerations further convinced me that “today was the day”.   So I prepared myself and on the way home, I got the feeling to stop for gas at a gas station that charges a little more for gasoline and one I normally wouldn’t stop at. But I was low on gas and didn’t want to risk running out and breaking down on the way to my marriage proposal. So I filled up.  



As I pulled out of the gas station, all the doubts that “today was the day” disappeared as I just so happened to pull into traffic behind a red pick-up truck that had a large “jewel’ decal on its back window that looked a lot like an engagement ring.  If I needed a final sign, God in His sovereign timing provided it.  As I drove most of the way down Route 9J, a symbol that represented marriage was placed right before me.  

When we “walk in the Spirit” God reveals Himself and His will for our lives in all kinds of ways. Sometimes He gives us a conviction to change. Sometimes we just feel overcome by peace, joy, or love when we worship Him. And other times the Holy Spirit will give us an intuition or a compulsion to do something good that will bless someone else and usually blesses us too.  

So, yesterday, even though I had a bunch of ideas about how things were “supposed to” play out with my engagement with TammyLyn, when I felt my heart and spirit lead me to take a more immediate, more sudden, and more spontaneous route to our betrothal I felt compelled to follow it.  

In further consideration, this new “sudden” plan would actually be appropriate in that I would be proposing to the woman I loved in the place and context with which we first met and as it turns out it would also just happen to be the place where we first kissed.  

So what are you going to do? Do you do what your spirit is telling you to do or do you do what has been planned or is more traditional or expected? 

Well, since I have been trying to follow the Lord’s will for my life with increasing progress and dedication since 2010, I have learned that while we may not fully understand what will happen from “following the Spirit” and know all the possible implications and consequences for doing so, the Spirit of God hasn’t led me astray yet.

I value the relationship that God has with me and I have seen the fruits for faithfulness in the past.  So yesterday, when I felt that familiar leading of the Spirit, I decided I not only felt compelled to follow the call, but I wanted to make TammyLyn my fiancé with all my heart and soul.  In this instance, doing the will of the Lord was also going to give me the desires of my heart.  

So last night just before class was to begin, I told TammyLyn about the significance of the day with my numerical ponderings and then, on bended knee, presented her with the engagement ring I had just received an hour or so before, and asked her to marry me.   She speechlessly nodded her ascent to the question and when prompted verbally said “Yes” to being my wife.

So brothers and sisters, walking in the Spirit down the path of Christian Discipleship is not an easy road to follow but I can tell you that it’s a journey that is paved with peace, joy, and love and when you keep walking and talking with God and follow His leadings you will find that He is indeed working all things together for your good. 

The Lord will never leave us or forsake us and through the fellowship of the saints and forming other godly relationships He will provide you with company for your life’s journey.  So keep going with God and see what He has for you on the other side of the bridge from today to tomorrow and from here to eternity.


If you can believe it I ran out of index cards for Bible verses! So I will be drawing verses from a gift I received from my beloved TammyLyn, although we were “just friends” at the time she gave it tom me. The NLT Bible Promise Book for Men is the resource and:

This morning’s meditation verse is:

Psalm 147:10-11 (NLT2)
10  He takes no pleasure in the strength of a horse or in human might.
11  No, the LORD’s delight is in those who fear him, those who put their hope in his unfailing love.

.

Today’s verse tells that the Lord isn’t really delighted by the strength of human might but is delighted by those who fear Him and put their faith in His unfailing love. 

The idea that God helps those who help themselves is not really drawn from scripture. While God does have a cooperative relationship with us in which He expects us to be responsible for “our part”, ultimately our acceptance by the Lord is not something that we earn through our efforts or the strength of human might. 

By faith we are saved, and if we understand what “walking in the Spirit” really means we also understand that our victories, our overcoming, and our progressive sanctification are also brought to us by faith.   When we believe we are set free, suddenly the shackles come off and if we “keep on believing”, we keep on receiving an abundant life of freedom that is defined by the fruit of the spirit.  

To fear God is to recognize His power and to respect it, to recognize His truth and to believe it, and understand His will and to perform it.   But it also involves recognizing God’s love for us and to accept it and share it.   

So stop trying so hard to “do something” and start fearing the Lord and put your hope in His unfailing love that has the power to heal and transform your life.  Our walk with God is a love relationship so show your love for Him by respecting who He says we are and by doing what He calls us to do.   We are not to be afraid of the Lord. We are to have a deep reverence and love for Him that takes what He says very seriously and causes us to obey what He calls us to do and just so happens to lead to a life of peace, joy, and purpose.    

 

 

As always, I invite all to go to mt4christ.org where I always share insights from prominent Christian counselors to assist my brothers and sisters in Christ with their walk. 

 

Today we conclude sharing from June Hunt’s Dating: Secrets to Great Relating When Dating  

 

As always, I share this information for educational purposes and encourage all to purchase June Hunt’s books for your own private study and to support her work. If you need this title you can find it online at several sites for less than $5.00:

B. What Is Contemporary Courtship?

Emily's friends sometimes wonder if Andrew is for real. When she first tells her friends about him, they ask if he is crazy...or if Emily is the one who has lost her mind. They think one—or both—live in the past and has no sense of the reality of today!

The cause for concern is because Emily and Andrew have committed to court instead of date. But this is no nineteenth or twentieth century form of courtship...this is contemporary courtship.

Andrew has asked her parents for the privilege of courting their daughter, assuring them that his intentions are sincere and honorable. And they have agreed, knowing their daughter is fond of Andrew. Likewise, they, too, admire Andrew, having spent considerable time with him to ascertain his beliefs, his aspirations, and the strength of his character and belief in God.

During this time of courtship, Andrew and Emily will spend time together, but they agree to remain accountable to both sets of parents. Surely God will bless them for honoring this significant commandment...

"Honor your father and your mother." (Exodus 20:12)

Since emotions come and go, passionate love may be here today and gone tomorrow. Divorce courts are full of statistics verifying the impermanence of romantic love. However, the pleasures and promises of a lasting marriage are built on more than passing passions. Common ground, such as having the same spiritual and cultural foundations, is a basis for more permanence in marriage. For this reason, courting is on the increase with teenagers and young adults in many places of the world.

  • Courting is a term used when a man seeks to gain the attention and favor of a woman with the ultimate intent of engagement and marriage.
  • Courting puts a strong emphasis on spending time in group settings to see whether there are multiple areas of common ground.
  • Courting provides the opportunity to publicly practice and display...
    • —Moral values and spiritual foundations
    • —Personal likes and dislikes
    • —Social and relational skills
    • —Maturity and experience
    • —Physical/sexual restraint

The Bible asks this rhetorical question...

"Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?" (Amos 3:3)


Biblical Counseling Keys: Dating: Secrets to Great Relating When Dating.

---------------------------more tomorrow------------------------

 

 

 

Join our “Victory over the Darkness” or “The Bondage Breaker” series of Discipleship Classes via the mt4christ247 podcast!

at https://mt4christ247.podbean.com, You can also find it on Apple podcasts (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-mt4christ247s-podcast/id1551615154). The mt4christ247 podcast is also available on Google Podcasts, Amazon Podcasts, Spotify, iHeartradio, and Audible.com. 

Email me at mt4christ247@gmail.com to receive the class materials, share your progress, and to be encouraged.

 

Encouragement for the Path of Christian Discipleship

Thursday, October 7, 2021

Blue, Are they a Christian in a Car? – Checking the Clues 8 - Purity 543


 

Blue, Are they a Christian in a Car?  – Checking the Clues 8  - Purity 543

Purity 543 10/07/2021 Purity 543 Podcast

Good morning

Today’s photo of a trail somewhere in upstate New York comes to us from a friend who decided to get out there last Saturday to enjoy the blue skies of the second day of October and to see the beginnings of the changing fall foliage.  Note to self: caption photos the moment to “save them” because you are too old to remember where they come from a week after the fact.  If the friend who captured this scene would like credit for sharing it or would like to tell us where this trail is in upstate NY, feel free to send us a comment and we will clue ourselves and everyone else in. 

If you haven’t guessed yet, the path of Christian Discipleship is not the path of perfection, but it is a path that can lead to progress.  While my memory doesn’t seem to be making much progress, I have increasingly learned of my need to write things down. But although I have “learned” and now “know” that I need to note my photo sources, it really won’t matter unless I “practice” what I know to be true by doing it!  

Today’s Thursday, and the reason I share photos of roadways, paths, or trails on Thursdays is to encourage my friends to take a step into the spiritual realm by developing a lifestyle of “walking in the Spirit”  where we learn about the God, Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit, and the wisdom that is contained in the Word of God and then actually put what we come to “know” into practice by applying it to our lives.  

The abundant life that Christ gives to us is something that we have to walk into by believing what the word of God says about us and about how we are supposed to live and by demonstrating that we believe it through our thoughts, attitudes, and actions.   

Currently, I am leading the Freedom in Christ Discipleship Course at Rock Solid Church in Hudson on Thursday evenings for anyone local and provide a podcast version of the material that is presented, for those who aren’t. So I invite you to “come and see”, or learn and experience, the transformed life of peace and joy that is possible through following Christ’s lead on the path of Christian Discipleship.    

As our current series has been examining the possible “clues” that a potential life partner’s Christian faith is authentic and would make a good Christian spouse, our imagination has conjured children’s television’s Blue and Dr. Seuss’ Sam I am to help us in our investigations to determine if someone really is who they say they are.  

As we have been slowly progressing through Sam I am’s litany of questions, today we consider the question:

Are they a Christian in a car?

Now I know, you may be thinking what in the world do cars have to do with the authenticity of someone’s Christian faith. 

Well, as I have stated previously, our examinations are not to determine if the people we are interested in for a possible relationship are going to heaven, we are trying to determine what kind of character they have and to see if that is consistent with the teachings from the word of God that would lead us to expect the growth of the Spirit in a believer’s life that would include: peace, love, joy, goodness, kindness, faithfulness, patience, gentleness, and self-control.    

So what better place to get a revealing look at someone’s character than behind the wheel of car in the various challenging situations that we can encounter on the road.     

Now to be clear: the way we drive or behave DOES NOT determine whether someone is an authentic Christian,  but like I said it could possibly tell us a lot about their character, personality, and maturity level.   Besides if you are thinking about spending the rest of your life with someone, you will have to live with how they are on the road as well as in the home so its not a bad idea to get a good look at who we are becoming involved with behind the wheel of a car.  

As we go for a ride, or take a drive with our potential partner questions we may ask ourselves in this area include: 

Are they a safe driver or are they reckless? Do they obey the rules of the road, or do they speed and break other rules of the road? Do they wear a seatbelt? Are they an angry driver? Do they swear? Are they patient? Are they a courteous driver? Are they aware or are they distracted? Are they on their phone?  

And finally, do I want to be in a car with this person every where I go for the rest of my life?           

Now if you have noticed in this series of “checking the clues” , we encourage everyone to take a long look at the attitudes and behaviors that other people display and to consider what that indicates about their character or the “authenticity” of their Christian faith life but at the same time, in this context we put the final determination of “what this all means” upon the person making the decision about forming a committed relationship.  

I am not creating a list of standards that people must measure up to, but I am attempting to encourage people to be discerning and to make conclusions based on their observations.    

In terms of faith, there are many different levels maturity that are possible in the wide spectrum of those who would identify themselves as “Christian”, so when we are looking to make a match for life we want to try to make sure we know where our future spouse is on that spectrum and make an informed decision when we decide to marry.

Likewise with driving behaviors and attitudes, there is a wide variety of the different skills and attitudes that can be played out on the road. So we should know who we will be driving through life with and get an idea how bumpy our journey may be if we decide to make this person “the one”.   

Ideally, a “Christian” driver would obey the traffic laws and be a safe, patient, and courteous driver.   Again, I said ideal!  Many of us will fall short of perfection in this area, including myself!   

And that’s really what being a Christian is all about. We will not be perfect.  We will struggle with demonstrating the attributes of an ideal Christian disciple but because we are “disciples” that mean we are learning. 

When something on the road makes us impatient or angry and we act poorly, or it is brought to our attention that we are being unsafe or are doing something wrong, we can choose to learn from our mistakes and ask God to help us change. With God any thing is possible, He can even correct our bad habits on the road.  

Now, don’t beat yourself up if you are not a perfect driver or a perfect Christian. Oh and you shouldn’t do that to your fellow drivers or fellow Christians either.  Our journey of faith is not one of perfection but with Lord we can make progress and when we are trying to choose a life partner we are best served when we choose one that can progress with us, both through our lives and in our faith.    

So keep walking and talking with God. Keep your eyes open when you are out on the road and in your relationships. If we listen to the Lord’s wisdom, He will show us the way to go and He will help us to read the “clues” of who we are supposed to walk or drive through life with.

 

This morning’s meditation verse is:

1 Thessalonians 4:16-17 (NKJV)
16  For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and with the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first.
17  Then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And thus we shall always be with the Lord.

Today’s verses point to a supernatural event that contradicts the scientific world view but should give the Christian great hope and assurance.    

These verses describe the return of Jesus in the event that is often referred to as the rapture.  

Christianity isn’t just a cute philosophy of life with rules of conduct that teach us to be nice people.  The doctrines of the Resurrection of Christ and of the dead and of the Day of the Lord simply blows the doors off the idea of a “common sense” faith.  

“It’s simple. Do good to others as you would have to them do to you”  is basically Christ’s second commandment but obviously does not encompass the entirety of our faith.  

In fact the general principle of the “golden rule” can be adopted by anyone regardless of their choice of religion or belief in God.  

But things like the Resurrection of the dead and the Rapture cause a major division between faith streams and even among different denominations of “Christians”.  

At the forefront of the controversy is Christ Himself. These verse mention Christ specifically. The “Lord Himself” will descend from heaven and the “dead in Christ” will rise and then we, meaning Christians, “who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And thus we shall always be with the Lord”.

This is a little more than “be nice to your neighbor”. This describes Christ coming back for His people before God pours His wrath out on the earth.  It is a wonderful promise for the Christian but horrible news for everyone else.  

I’m currently reading Revelation, today chapter 16, and I can tell you that it describes some horrible events that will come to pass and that the only safety is through a reconciled relationship with God through faith in Jesus Christ.

While science states that the universe will just run down like an old clock with everything dying as the last star fades to black, the Word of God tells us that God will reclaim the earth, pour out His wrath on it and create a new heaven and a new earth where those who put their faith in Christ will dwell with the Lord in eternity.   

These “end times” verses in the Bible, is God telling us the truth of what will come to pass. While we as Christians should rejoice that we will be saved from God’s wrath, the knowledge of these verses should motivate us to speak the truth in love and tell other people of the grave danger they are in without a relationship with Jesus Christ.  

So don’t worry about the future, God has plan for the Christian that is good but at the same time be sure to share the gospel of Jesus Christ with as many as you can. Our voices can be used by God to bring people from death to life.  So tell your loved ones, neighbors, and friends that God loves them and there is eternal safety available to all who make Jesus their Lord and Savior.

 

 As always, I invite all to go to mt4christ.org where I always share insights from prominent Christian counselors to assist my brothers and sisters in Christ with their walk. 

 

Today we begin sharing from June Hunt’s Dating: Secrets to Great Relating When Dating.

 

As always, I share this information for educational purposes and encourage all to purchase June Hunt’s books for your own private study and to support her work. If you need this title you can find it online at several sites for less than $5.00:

"First seek the counsel of the Lord." (1 Kings 22:5 NIV)

A date usually describes a specific point in time... often a significant appointment on the calendar. However, different kinds of dates exist in our world. A great date for her could be described like this...

Following a delicious dinner, their evening continues with a romantic carriage ride beneath a starlit sky. Aware of only each other, the couple's short ride ends as the two draw close, their eyes meet and lips touch in a tender good-night kiss. (Ahhh!)

Or a great date for him could look like this...

They're cheering in the stands—he scrambles... throws... scores! As the whistle blows, the two among 2,000 are jumping, yelling, and high-fiving. Food, football, and first place—nothing could be better! Exiting the arena, they huddle close, dodging the winter air. And at the car, he can't wait, "When can I see you again?" (Wow!)

Oh, yes—two great dates! Some singles see dating as a demoralizing waiting game... others as a desperate mating game. In utter desperation, they assume, I must have someone to meet my needs. But God's view is different. He is the One who promises to meet our deepest needs, thus we need not view dating as a last-ditch effort to get our needs met. Being our Need-Meeter is His job.

Our job is to become mature—to grow in Christlike character. Therefore, dating is an opportunity to develop social skills, self-control, and healthy relationships that selflessly seek the highest good of another person.

Rather than scanning the social landscape for a "perfect match," we need to view dating as an ideal time to focus on becoming the person God intends us to be. For many, this journey will someday end in marriage. For some, it will not. But, when done God's way, dating develops godly character and forms friendships that flourish. Ultimately, His promise to be our Need-Meeter takes the "desperation" out of dating. The Bible says...

"My God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:19)

I. Definitions

Whether you are 16 or 26 or 62, traveling the dating terrain can lead all the way to "heartbreak hotel" more often than "happily ever after" Why then do so many people keep dating?

Many who are lonely think marriage provides the missing piece of the puzzle. Others just want to have fun and get acquainted with a variety of people. Most believe dating will prepare them for marriage because the world presents marriage as the preferred social "norm."

But, does dating truly fulfill all these expectations?

Many people are afraid—fearful they will pick the wrong person. How do they overcome this fear? The answer lies in not focusing on finding the kind of person you want to date but on becoming the person God wants you to be as a date. If God plans for you to marry, be at peace—He promises to bring the right person across your path....

"Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." (Proverbs 19:21)

A. What Is Dating?

Imagine their surprise! Doug and Donna's 12 year-old announces that a boy at school wants to take her to a movie. The couple exchange glances... then her dad reminds their daughter of the rule: She's not allowed to date until she turns 16. Wanting God's best for Susie, her parents encourage her to pursue friendships for now.

The concept of dating is definitely up for discussion—to prepare Susie for the future—but the consent to date is decidedly off the table...and will be for a few more years. Meanwhile, Doug and Donna demonstrate respect within their own relationship, and Doug helps Susie "practice" dating by taking her out on daddy/daughter dates. In this way, Susie will understand her worth in her parents' eyes and learn how to relate in social settings without anxiety and pressure. This helps Doug and Donna guide their daughter to become mature as they themselves seek God's wisdom on dating....

"For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding." (Proverbs 2:6)

Nowhere in the Bible does God say that we—His carefully planned creations—are to live isolated from one another. In fact, after creating Adam, the Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone" (Genesis 2:18). Then God created Eve for Adam to marry.

But how do you know if marriage is God's plan for you? And if it is, how do you know whether you have found the right person to date? Even more importantly, how do you become the right person to date? Purposeful dating can help you discover some of its benefits.

  • Dating is a relationship between a male and a female who participate in prearranged social activities.
  • Dating means setting aside time for social interaction with someone of the opposite sex. Dating describes male/female companionship that can move beyond close friendship into a romantic relationship.
  • Dating provides the opportunity to...
    • —Learn how to communicate with the opposite sex
    • —Help define what traits you do and don't desire in a future mate
    • —Come into contact with potential marriage partners
    • —Grow socially and emotionally, intellectually and spiritually

Knowing the truth of God's love takes the desperation out of dating, as Scripture clearly states...

"So we know the love that God has for us, and we trust that love. God is love. Those who live in love live in God, and God lives in them." (1 John 4:16 NCV)

Necessity of Dating

Question: "Although I'm in my late twenties, I have never dated. I don't feel romantically drawn to women (and I'm not gay). How important is dating?"

Answer: Dating is not essential for great relating, but dating offers a practical option if your desire is to eventually get married.

God has a wonderful plan for your life and His plan is perfect—whether you remain single or marry. Wonderful marriages are often built between people who have never or have seldom dated... until God at a point in time causes their lives to intersect. God makes it clear in His Word that the sexual relationship is reserved only for marriage. As you stay focused on deepening your relationship with the Lord and increase your ability to care for others, He will bring into your life that which fulfills the deepest desires of your heart....

"Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart" (Psalm 37:4).


Biblical Counseling Keys: Dating: Secrets to Great Relating When Dating.

---------------------------more tomorrow------------------------

 

 

 

Join our “Victory over the Darkness” or “The Bondage Breaker” series of Discipleship Classes via the mt4christ247 podcast!

at https://mt4christ247.podbean.com, You can also find it on Apple podcasts (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-mt4christ247s-podcast/id1551615154). The mt4christ247 podcast is also available on Google Podcasts, Amazon Podcasts, Spotify, iHeartradio, and Audible.com. 

Email me at mt4christ247@gmail.com to receive the class materials, share your progress, and to be encouraged.

 

Encouragement for the Path of Christian Discipleship

Wednesday, October 6, 2021

Blue, Are they a Christian with a Fox? – Checking the Clues 7 - Purity 542

Blue, Are they a Christian with a Fox?  – Checking the Clues 7  - Purity 542

Purity 542 10/06/2021 Purity 542 Podcast

Good morning

Today’s photo of a “Turn around somewhere in Grand Gore” comes to us from a friend whose view on life can usually be counted on to brighten our day.  The pickings have been somewhat slim lately when it comes to selecting the photo of the day, perhaps because I am looking at social media less or perhaps it’s because of the shift in the seasons. But this morning as I felt hard pressed to select a photo and looked back in the archives and was seeking to remember the source of one I was thinking of sharing. I went to the photographer of this photo’s FB page.  In my search I found this beauty of a shot that was shared back on September 24th and thought it was a terrific change of pace as the last two days in upstate NY have been rainy and overcast.  

It’s funny because I only know this person through social media, a common interest, and through their posts, I have a sense of their quirky sense of humor and their adventurous spirit. So when I looked to get a new view, I immediately decided to check their FB page.  You have to love it when you have people in your life, no matter how small the scale, that can brighten your day. It is my prayer that the blue sky, green meadow, evergreen mountains, and shining sun in my friend’s photo brighten your day.

But as I hope for sunshine and blue skies to greet us all on this sixth day of October, Blues Clue’s Blue and Dr. Seuss’ Sam I am,  are back in my imagination to continue our examination of different aspects of the Christian Faith that can give us a “clue” that someone we suspect of having faith may truly be an “Authentic” or “Real” Christian.   

As a reminder, I have several single Christian friends who have recently prayed for a Christian life partner which motivated me to think about what “clues” would be helpful in  determining if a potential suitor was a “sheep or a goat”.  

In some of the scariest verses in the Bible (Matthew 7:21-23; Luke 13:25-27), Jesus Himself proclaims that there will be some people who claim to be Christians but who will be exposed for their false faith.  

I understand the difficulties is determining someone’s righteous standing with God, but for our purposes we are only looking for “clues” and “fruit” in someone’s life that would indicate that they MAY have an authentic Christian faith.  Our examination is not condemning anyone to hell but could prove helpful in avoiding the hell of being unequally yoked.  

Everyone should be wise and discerning in choosing an “authentic” life partner, whether Christian or not.    But I’m a Christian and so are my friends who are praying for a Christian life partner so we are looking for possible “clues” in someone’ attitudes and behaviors that would indicate their Christian faith is “real”.  

As Sam I Am has intruded into the Blue’s Clues universe with his line of inquiry, today we consider the question: “Are they a Christian with a fox?”

Well, foxes are like wolves, right? And the image of a wolf in sheep’s clothing is often used to demonstrate someone who is not who they say they are and who may even have malevolent intent . And no offense, but  if you are trying to convince a Christian that there are other ways to live outside of the ways that are prescribed in the word of God, you may not realize it, but you are pushing the rebellious agenda of the spirit of antichrist and your “well intentioned” advice is actually malevolent.  Shots fired.     

So for this question,  the “fox” would represent a non-Christian or some one who claims to be a Christian but is entrenched in a lifestyle that is more sinful than saintly.  Questions in this scenario that we might ask are:

Does our potential life partner’s faith change with the company they keep?   

Do they dabble in sin because of “peer pressure”?

Do they have close friends that are clearly not Christians or who are involved in activities that are against the word of God?     Is their family Christian?

Are their attitudes affected by their “fox friend’s opinions” or are they based on the wisdom of the word of God?

When they are “in the world”, do they represent the kingdom of God or are they just “regular” folk?  

Do their “fox friends” know they are a Christian? Does anybody?

Again these questions are not intended to cause division or to indicate that someone is “bad” – These same questions could be asked in regard to any faith stream, interest, philosophy of life, political standing, or moral code.  They are not “Christian judge-y” questions.  They are questions that all people should ask about anyone they may want to be in relationship with when trying to determine if you would make a “good couple”.

For our purposes our Christian faith and lifestyle is important to us, and we don’t wish to cause ourselves or the other person any unnecessary heartache by forming a relationship that will be contentious.    

As a Christian who teaches about living as a disciple of Christ’s teachings, we seek to find peace in our relationships, but we also want to have peace with the Lord by living according to His ways and not the world’s ways.      

When we say we are a Christian but don’t live according to God’s ways, we are unstable in all our ways and may discover that our “Christian label” that we wear on special occasions may “not stick” when it comes to eternity.  

God calls us to a holy life so when someone says they are a Christian but who demonstrates that their attitudes and behaviors change when they hang out with their “fox friends”, we have to ask ourselves: “Are they for real?” and “Do I really want to be in a relationship with someone who may be a phony in the one area that I consider to be the most important aspect of my life?”  

As you can see, our line of questioning always considers ourselves and where we stand with God as much is it tries to determine if the other person is who they say they are.  

So keep walking and talking with God.  Be wise in the ways you walk out your Christian faith and remember that the best way to find a “real Christian” is to be one yourself and to not compromise your convictions for convenience.     


This morning’s meditation verse is:

2 Timothy 2:22 (NKJV)
22  Flee also youthful lusts; but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

Today’s verse tells us what to avoid, what to pursue, and the company we are to keep.  

I swear I didn’t set this up, but today’s verse goes right in line with what we were examining in terms of Christians with “fox friends”.   

We all sin and fall short of the glory God. Before Christ, we sinned a bunch and didn’t think anything of it and while we are forgiven of every sin we will ever do, including future sins, Paul’s letter to Timothy tells us that Christians are not to persist in their “youthful lusts”. 

As Christians we are to repent, which means we are to change our minds about how we think about those “youthful lusts” and turn from them. We are to stop doing the sins of our past and instead choose, every day, to pursue “righteousness, faith, love” and “peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.”  

So not only are we supposed to reject our old sinful ways and abstain from doing them, we are to seek to do the things of God, acts of righteousness that will build up our faith and give us a sense of peace while experiencing the love of God and the fellowship of the saints.

Yes, the word of God says to hang out with “those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart”, indicating that we are not only supposed to be in fellowship with Christians but that we are to seek “authentic” – “pure”  Christians that we be a blessing to us in our pursuits of righteousness rather than those “carnal Christians” that will lead us  back to our “youthful lusts”.  

So don’t feel bad about being wise in who you decided to spend time with and be in relationship with.  While we are to be a light of the world to the unbeliever, the word of God shows us that we are to be faithful to the Lord’s commands to be “pure” and to avoid associations that will lead to conflict, compromise, or sin.  

So, “pursue righteousness… with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart” and you will discover that when you do, the temptation to fall into “youthful lusts” will be much less and that you will experience the benefits of “faith, love, and peace.

 

As always, I invite all to go to mt4christ.org where I always share insights from prominent Christian counselors to assist my brothers and sisters in Christ with their walk. 

 

Today we conclude sharing from June Hunt’s The Blended Family’s God’s Recipe for Success.

 

As always, I share this information for educational purposes and encourage all to purchase June Hunt’s books for your own private study and to support her work. If you need this title you can find it online at several sites for less than $5.00:

F. Blended Family Bonding

Build a solid relationship with your spouse.

  • Base your relationship on Christ.
  • Face difficulties with a united front.
  • Move to a neutral home if possible.

"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." (Genesis 2:24)

Observe family traditions and holidays with flexibility.

  • Be aware of various family expectations.
  • Be considerate of children who are caught in the middle.
  • Be willing to sacrifice personal expectations for holidays.

"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." (Romans 12:10)

Nurture the children's nuclear family relationships.

  • Respect the missing parent's rights.
  • Encourage communication with all grandparents and relatives.
  • Encourage holiday cards, birthday gifts and thank-you notes.

"Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you." (Exodus 20:12)

Determine to stand firm.

  • Don't relax your standards.
  • Don't be sensitive to rejection.
  • Don't expect a problem free family.

"The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.... Discipline your son, and he will give you peace; he will bring delight to your soul." (Proverbs 29:15, 17)

Initiate family structure.

  • Work toward a biblical authority structure.
  • Have well-defined boundaries.
  • Maintain consistent discipline.
  • Be united in decisions.

"The Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in." (Proverbs 3:12)

Negotiate mutual ground.

  • Encourage open and honest communication.
  • Have frequent family meetings and devotions.
  • Talk, talk, talk with each other!

"I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought." (1 Corinthians 1:10)

Grow in dependence upon Christ.

  • See your personal identity in Christ.
  • Don't depend on others for happiness.

"Just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness." (Colossians 2:6-7)

Insights for the Instant Parent

  • Realize that becoming an instant parent is a challenging task.
  • Remember that you're not replacing a parent; you're offering a new relationship.
  • Reinforce your commitment to the marriage for the benefit of the child.
  • Regard your role as God's example of what a marriage is intended to be.
  • Rebuild a gradual authority system to function by Biblical guidelines.
  • Reflect the love of God by providing security for the child.
  • Refuse to judge or criticize the missing parent.
  • Resist the temptation to withdraw emotionally if you are not immediately accepted.
  • Resolve to pray for the child and for your marriage.
  • Relinquish your right to be respected and loved—it may take a very long time.

"Since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." (Hebrews 12:1-2)

A blended family is like a jagged jigsaw puzzle.

If you force the pieces to fit, you destroy the potential design.

If you wait for God to work it, the picture comesin time.

June Hunt

Selected Bibliography

Adkins, Kay. I'm Not Your Kid: A Christian's Guide to a Healthy Stepfamily. Grand Rapids: Baker, 2004.

Brown, Beth E. When You 're Mom No. 2: A Word of Hope for Stepmothers. Ann Arbor, MI: Vine, 1991.

Cerling, Charles. Remarriage: Opportunity to Grow. Old Tappan, NJ: Power, 1988.

Cresse, Michelle. Jigsaw Families: Solving the Puzzle of Remarriage. Lynnwood, WA: Aglow, 1989.

Frydenger, Tom, and Adrienne Frydenger. The Blended Family. Old Tappan, NJ: Chosen, 1984.

Frydenger, Tom, and Adrienne Frydenger. Resolving Conflict in the Blended Family. Tarrytown, NY: Chosen, 1991.

Houck, Don, and LaDean Houck. Remarried with Children: a Blended Couple's Journey to Harmony. San Bernardino, CA: Here's Life, 1991.

Houmes, Dan, and Paul Meier. Growing in Step: A Christian Guide to Stepparenting. Richardson, TX: Today, 1985.

Hunt, Angela Elwell. Loving Someone Else's Child. Wheaton, IL: Tyndale House, 1992.

Hunt, June. Counseling Through Your Bible Handbook. Eugene, Oregon: Harvest House Publishers, 2007.

Hunt, June. How to Forgive... When You Don't Feel Like It. Eugene, Oregon: Harvest House Publishers, 2007.

Hunt, June. How to Handle Your Emotions. Eugene, Oregon: Harvest House Publishers, 2008.

Hunt, June. Seeing Yourself Through God's Eyes. Eugene, Oregon: Harvest House Publishers, 2008

Marsolini, Maxine. Blended Families: Creating Harmony as You Build a New Home Life. Chicago: Moody, 2000.

Solomon, Charles. The Rejection Syndrome. Wheaton, IL: Tyndale House, 1982.

VanVonderen, Jeff. Families Where Grace Is in Place. Minneapolis, MN: Bethany House, 1992.

 

Biblical Counseling Keys: The Blended Family: God's Recipe for Success.

---------------------------more tomorrow------------------------

 

 

 

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Encouragement for the Path of Christian Discipleship